Frisbees

Why do paper plates always tilt to the left when I try to use them as frisbees?

Dear Disturbed,

That is a good observation and one worth commenting on.

Paper plates are artifacts of a once grand but now vanished civilization. Their sole function is to emulate the frisbees that some folks are too cheap to buy. Any attempt at using them to hold things, such as beans and potato salad, immediately draws their wrath and they will dump their contents on the nearest lap. When then of frisbees? These "Yarmulkes of the Gods" are the Scientific equivalent of the Tibetan prayer wheels. Crafted by Frisbeterians, who believe that when you die your soul gets stuck on the roof and no one can get it down, and bought by a world-wide group of worshippers, these disks symbolize the spinning of the electrons around the atom. This secret was given to ancient man by a Greyline tour saucer guide from Tau Ceti. Ever since then, the Frisbeterians have kept the secret alive though hidden from the uninitiated. As far as why they drift to the left, it is a Scientific law that all kitchenware in the northen hemisphere will circle left. It is known as the Corell-is force.

Remember, we are not alone! And we will probably have to clean up after them when they leave.

Yours for a refreshingly more Scientific world,
Dr. Nucleus